sergeantjerkbarnes:

can we please discuss what the fuck is wrong with pennsylvania

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and finally

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(via zackisontumblr)


Confidence is being able to say “Fuck you, I’m the shit” without opening your mouth, say it with your walk, with your smile, say it with your entire being.
Tati-Ana Mercedes (via bl-ossomed)

(via zackisontumblr)


bonelessbuffalochicken:

"You’re gonna do great today"

bonelessbuffalochicken:

"You’re gonna do great today"

(via zackisontumblr)


yungterra:

inturlrude:

yungterra:

naked body fresh out the shower

you touch yourself afterhours

why do you have this dirty ass skeleton

he’s obviously not dirty he just took a fuckin shower got dam

(via honorary-witch)


villarrr:

THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE THING

villarrr:

THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVORITE THING

(via fuckyeahloldemort)


dinogirl94:

americandreambarbie:

dewgongo:

lorde’s 17 and shes expected to smile and wave and be perfectly fine in front of millions like hell i get nervous standing up to get off the bus, ya’ll need to leave her alone

britney spears could do it when she was 17 

britney spears had a mental breakdown years later as a result of being put on a silver platter for the media and public this is such a gross response i can’t believe so many people have reblogged this

(via fuckyeahloldemort)


sabistuki:

STOP. This is the police, you’re under arrest for being too cute. Now, put your hands where I can hold them.

(via fuckyeahloldemort)



starkweek:

jesus, take the wheel. now put it in first - no, put the clutch in and - jesus, what the fuck, you said you could drive stick

(via fuckyeahloldemort)


kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails

(via fuckyeahloldemort)


heathicorn:

am i the only one who rehearses things i might say in advance? and I don’t mean like my theoretical oscars acceptance speech i mean like what i’ll say to the pizza guy when I answer the door in my pjs

(via fuckyeahloldemort)


signedfury:

realest plot-twist ever.

(via honorary-witch)



valentinostclaire:

Why does toilet paper NEED a commercial? Who is not buying toilet paper?

(via honorary-witch)


burgerkid:

burgerkid:

burgerkid:

Who does a pharaoh talk to when he’s sad?

His mummy.

i lost 10 followers already

(via zackisontumblr)